Love this collaboration! I think a lot about community these days, and talk about finding "my people." I, too, have felt the importance of connection with others, no matter our differences, but have crashed repeatedly into the challenges. I wrote an essay about my attempts to at least like my difficult neighbors: https://lisareneeh.medium.com/the-call-for-unity-is-a-utopian-fantasy-3de0fa2316d2). I'm all for smiling and making eye contact, and I try to always be kind. But people are tough, some of them impossible. I would love to find a writing group, however. I can take a little challenge and would love some comfort.
Some people are absolutely harder than others. I feel your struggle, Lisa. I've been reading Amanda Ripley's amazing book, High Conflict, which is helping me a little bit to sort through a lot of these feelings. Also a great interview with her on the On Being podcast. Thanks for reading and commenting!
I'm looking forward to reading your essay, Lisa. It's interesting that you are looking into a writing group. It's been a while since I've been in one but each group I've been part of has made a huge difference to me as a writer.
I listened to that interview with Rick Rubin this week too. Nadia Colburn also reminded me this week that writing moves through us. I think community is so important, but I do also think it is important to make sure you have conversations with people who think differently than you. I try and teach my students how to dialogue not just too debate, how to listen, not just to steam roll. I am trying to do the same in my marriage, in my parenting in my relationship to the world. Betsy, I took a pic last summer on the steps of that church. They had a pride flag on the steps and I thought that was beautiful and inclusive and if we had a church that did that here, maybe I would attend more, maybe not. I teach an adult writing class which usually forms it’s own little community pod. Gathering with these folks who enjoy finding meaning, who want to grow as people at 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, 70 is pretty cool. I think my students though are my best reminders of what can happen when someone cultivates a safe space for sharing and listening to stories.
Sharing stories is one of the things that can evoke that feeling of awe in me and, when you think about it, that is what strangers do when they first meet: they share little stories, or big ones, and this creates a connection. Writer's groups are great places to do this.
Yes, Mary. I find those conversations with people I disagree with easier in a classroom setting, which is probably because I’m in charge! I struggle with those conversations more in other settings, but one of things I’m working on.
Agree creativity is a human birthright. No time like the present to own this.
Enjoyed reading Marro post. Appreciate the books suggested
Thank you, Sandy. You'll have to let us know how the books strike you.
Love this collaboration! I think a lot about community these days, and talk about finding "my people." I, too, have felt the importance of connection with others, no matter our differences, but have crashed repeatedly into the challenges. I wrote an essay about my attempts to at least like my difficult neighbors: https://lisareneeh.medium.com/the-call-for-unity-is-a-utopian-fantasy-3de0fa2316d2). I'm all for smiling and making eye contact, and I try to always be kind. But people are tough, some of them impossible. I would love to find a writing group, however. I can take a little challenge and would love some comfort.
Some people are absolutely harder than others. I feel your struggle, Lisa. I've been reading Amanda Ripley's amazing book, High Conflict, which is helping me a little bit to sort through a lot of these feelings. Also a great interview with her on the On Being podcast. Thanks for reading and commenting!
I'm looking forward to reading your essay, Lisa. It's interesting that you are looking into a writing group. It's been a while since I've been in one but each group I've been part of has made a huge difference to me as a writer.
Robin,
I listened to that interview with Rick Rubin this week too. Nadia Colburn also reminded me this week that writing moves through us. I think community is so important, but I do also think it is important to make sure you have conversations with people who think differently than you. I try and teach my students how to dialogue not just too debate, how to listen, not just to steam roll. I am trying to do the same in my marriage, in my parenting in my relationship to the world. Betsy, I took a pic last summer on the steps of that church. They had a pride flag on the steps and I thought that was beautiful and inclusive and if we had a church that did that here, maybe I would attend more, maybe not. I teach an adult writing class which usually forms it’s own little community pod. Gathering with these folks who enjoy finding meaning, who want to grow as people at 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, 70 is pretty cool. I think my students though are my best reminders of what can happen when someone cultivates a safe space for sharing and listening to stories.
Sharing stories is one of the things that can evoke that feeling of awe in me and, when you think about it, that is what strangers do when they first meet: they share little stories, or big ones, and this creates a connection. Writer's groups are great places to do this.
Yes, Mary. I find those conversations with people I disagree with easier in a classroom setting, which is probably because I’m in charge! I struggle with those conversations more in other settings, but one of things I’m working on.