21 Comments

Delightful post, Robyn. I am forever trying to find that perfect ratio. And I love Mary Oliver and Joni Mitchell. x

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Thanks so much, Kathy. Two amazing women who have been the source of such comfort to me.

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What a lovely, contemplative (and funny) post. Ah, balance! Re the sea mouse, I looked and I'm just fine never, ever seeing a real one.

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I know! Isn’t the sea mouse sort of gross? And in the poem, Mary Oliver picks it up. And touches it. Talk about being astonished!

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O'Connors quote reminds of Camus “And the more I thought about it, the more I dug out my memory things I had overlooked or forgotten. I realized then that a man who had lived only one day could easily live for a hundred years in prison. He would have enough memories to keep him from being bored.

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That’s a good one. Probably true, but hoping none of us have to go to prison to put it to the test.

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Robyn, add me to the list of readers who admire this post . . . and enjoy Mary Oliver and Joni Mitchell. Thanks for putting this into words.

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Yes, every morning the Mary Oliver poems feel like a wise friend sitting next to me as I drink my tea and watch the world outside (it’s a little too cold to get out there right now in Indiana!).

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There definitely is a balance between living and writing or being and doing - we are all trying to find it and I think it is different for everyone. I just figure if I can't hear the voice of God (or the Muse) anymore - it's time to go seek it.

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That’s good advice, Dawn. Thanks for reading and commenting!

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You are welcome!

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DEFINITELY surly! In a good way.

:)

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Thanks, Lisa. I might have gotten a tiny bit less surly with age, but probably not.

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Loved this. For the record I have never liked Warren Beatty. Something about his mouth.

If you find the perfect ratio of art to life, please tell us what it is. Please.

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I know what my perfect ratio is, but I have not yet achieved it consistently. My perfect ratio is to spend most of the morning and early afternoon writing or doing other solitary-type things. Then in the evening, I’d gather with friends. I’ve often thought I should design a writing retreat exactly along these lines. Maybe someday.

Oh, Betsy, you’re wiser than me when it comes to Warren Beatty. I even fell for men who vaguely looked like him and that was every bit as misguided as falling for Warren Beatty.

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Your ideal ratio sounds perfect. It says something about me that I read this and went "yeah!" and then immediately wondered when I would walk the dogs or clean the toilets. Or talk to my husband. Yes to a retreat. If you build it, I would like to come.

I'm sorry about WB's influence -- but I bet some of those misguided attractions had their fun moments...

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Oh, I have been dreaming of doing a writing retreat here on the beautiful shores of the Ohio River for years. Maybe now’s the time!

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I just adored reading this essay, Robyn. You have a knack for keeping your reader engaged in your reflections!

These lines really resonated with something I've been thinking about lately, and wrote about in a Note yesterday:

"But their actual lived lives were quite different from their poetry or their songs. In their music and their words, they transform their lives into something different. They transform their lives into something bigger. Sometimes more beautiful. They chock it full of meaning that might not have been there in the actual moment. That, my friends, is art." My Note was about not putting your favorite Substack writers on a pedestal because you're going to find out they're human and flawed just like you. But I love how you summed up this "gap" between writing and real life: It's Art!

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Thanks so much, Don. I saw your Note the other day and it’s quite true. There’s a person whose writing I absolutely love. Like, I assumed this writer had met my family, they wrote fictional characters that were so familiar. I was certain that when I got the chance to meet this writer in a workshop, they would be amazing in person. We would be best friends. We were not and that was okay. I still love their writing.

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Loved this piece. Some parts made me laugh out loud, like Mary Oliver not having enough time to go outside if she had been a novelist. As a Canadian, I love Joni Mitchell but I'm more of a Carly Simon girl. Carly also had a fling with Warren Beatty, was once married to James Taylor, flirted with Mick Jagger and others, so I guess she fell in love a lot too. How did they make time to create, I wonder?

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Yes, I think that whole circle of folk singers/Hollywood actors/rock stars had a lot more time in their day than I do. And Carly had kids, too!

Thanks for reading and commenting!

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